As many of you know (but I realize that some of you may not), Fridays are religious holidays for Pastafarians. So, what does that mean?
Fridays are days that those who follow the FSM take as days of enjoyment, spending time with their wenches, drinking grog, and practicing an overall general merriment. Fridays are meant to be spent in full Pirate (the FSM's chosen people) regalia. So get dressed, drunk, and merry!
Be aware, however, that others may not be quite used to seeing people dressed as Pirates and may give you some funny looks. It's okay. This is a perfect time to educate others as to our beliefs. Be further aware that there are some out there that may get hostile when explaining our overall belief system and loose moral values. Take special precaution when discussing FSMism with "Born Again" Christians, and Christian Athletes (who are typically much stronger and a ton more mean than the normal person). Also remember that our religion is one of peace and one that rejects religious dogma, so don't go spreading your own version of dogma to others. Merely focus on the hard facts as to why we believe the way we do.
When spreading the good word of the FSM, you may want to consider:
1. The evidence that points toward the relationship between global warming and the decreasing number of pirates.
2. The influence that the FSM had on the development of the theory of Evolution (which is totally wrong).
3. The similarities we share with other organized religions in that we also believe in Intelligent Design (coming from the FSM), and lastly
4. Strong descriptions of our Heaven which is full of stripper factories (male stripper factories for the ladies) and beer volcanoes and how bad ass cool that is!!
In summary, enjoy the holiday and take the chance to remember our Pirate roots and spread the word about the noodly FSM!!
FSM Prophet
No comments:
Post a Comment